Yup. Enough said right? You pray for patience and you find yourself losing it more often. So, you try to counter act it by not praying for it, and practice the patience you’ve already acquired. Oh but then, along comes that one instance to which you learn that patience you’ve been practicing has a limit. It’s this crazy cycle.
I’ve been learning a lot about patience. It seems to just pop out at me from every corner. When I read the Bible I see it. Hidden right there behind the words written down hundreds of years ago. In different friendships its exercised, and not just by me God knows my friends have learned a bit about patience through me. In my family. I mean who hasn’t dealt with that in the family?
One of the first things love is defined as in 1 Corinthians 13 is patience. “Love is patient…” That makes me chuckle, I don’t know why, but God has a funny sense of humor. Why would that be the first thing listed to describe love? I don’t have an answer for that, or even an opinion. It doesn’t really matter though, it is what it is.
I’ve met this amazing man and patience is something he’s been teaching me. I don’t think it’s a conscious effort on his part, but nonetheless, he’s been teaching me a lesson on the subject. Through different events in my life, like this one, I’ve learned to be patient with others. To have understanding for where that person is coming from, what they have experienced, and how it effects the daily grind of her or his life. For example, this guy, he’s made it through a lot in his life. He’s walked through heartache and disappointments. He’s seen loved ones be torn down and built back up. Honestly the fact that he is who he is, is seriously an act of God. And what do I see behind those piercing blue eyes, that remind me of galaxies (Haha I know I’m cheesy), and the life he’s experienced so far? Patience. He may not see it but I definitely do.
It’s difficult for many women, and dare I say some men, to be patient in a relationship. Especially if you reached that age where not only are a lot of your friends married, but are having their second child. For me personally that hasn’t been a huge struggle, you know seeing my friends get married and have kids. There are those days don’t get me wrong, but they haven’t occurred too often. At my age though, 25, I’m at a place where I know who I am and what I want, for the most part, out of life. And I’ll be honest it’s hard to be patient and difficult to just enjoy the current movement of my relationship. I’ve always been attracted to the unknown, and that is exactly what the future is. I want to know! Haha. Which I know wouldn’t be any fun. It would be like finding your Christmas presents as a kid before Christmas (which I’ve experienced). Yet, I still want to know, and yet again, my patience is well strengthened I guess.
The interesting thing is that my man and I don’t really talk much about the future. You know what kind of “future” I mean. He has a slight aversion to it haha, and frankly so do I, but his aversion has caused me to slow my roll even more. And I’m not freaking out. Which from previous experiences and conversations with my girlfriends its well slightly unusual. I don’t have an urgency though. I think a lot of that is due to the fact that he makes me feel very comfortable and confident in our relationship. His aversion to making long term commitments (ah I know crazy that a man would be like that! Haha) has taught me patience. I’m at this place where I’m not stressed about where our relationship will go, or if it will end, or even really thinking much about all that. I feel stable and secure.
I’m amazing at the unique ways God teaches me things. I’ve always heard how you learn a lot about yourself in a relationship, and obviously the other person, and what I’ve experienced so far in the midst of it all is that God is working something up. He’s teaching you things you sometimes don’t even recognize as lessons. You just figure it is what it is. To think that He is constantly and consistently working in our lives is, well, almost incomprehensible. Almost.
Patience is virtue, or so I’m told. I, for one, want to be virtuous.